Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
i drank out of a bidet.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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