Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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