My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
His nipple licking is glorious
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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