Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
me + whiskey = a bad person
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
