This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
i just made my gag reflex go away.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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