My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize