Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
