I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
