yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
