Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
