some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Randomize
