What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
I party with great urgency now.
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