Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
