just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
