Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize