Whod you bang
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize