what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
