What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Randomize
