i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I could fuck to npr.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Randomize
