I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
