Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
