Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
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