You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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