First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
