I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Randomize
