wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize
