Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
my shit smells like andre
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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