Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Is it penis luge time yet?
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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