wat bout pragnant strippers??
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
