My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
