how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
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