she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
