One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
True college students do jello shots in the library
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