I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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