i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
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