I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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