Acid is not a monday night drug
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize
