STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
