Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
