Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
