is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
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