This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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