Its about making memories worth repressing
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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