Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Can I color on your dick again?
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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