Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
