JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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