That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
