There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
