Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
