i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
tell me about the eggs
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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